xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
