so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Whoever labeled dysfunctional a bad thing obviously never saw this frinedship coming.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
Randomize