you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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