So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Your mom can still drink beer standing on her head! Talk to you tomorrow :)
Mom wtf!?
I feel like my teeth are sweating.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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