Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
Man, that hitchhiker cursed me.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
