Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
I think I'm pregnant with his hipster baby. It keeps kicking my stomach to the beat of mgmt songs.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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