He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize