it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
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