I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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