U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
Just walked into the bathroom and looked straight ahead and made eye contact with a guy taking a shit through the crack in the stall door...
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize