ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
Whenever a guy asks me why I like weird sex stuff, I just answer, "Catholic School".
Randomize
