'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Randomize