Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm beginning to think shitting his pants is just a normal thing for him.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
