Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Your list of "good ideas" thumbtacked to the lampshade last night consisted of nothing but "tampon-pen" with a note indicating that girls could then always have something to write with, even naked.
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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