he just booty called me in advance instead of waiting til 3 am when hes trashed. i think thats really considerate and gentlemanlike.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Well, I just did coke with a drag queen in a bathroom so that's the direction this night is taking
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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