I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
nah, they dropped the charges. apparently ripping his junk when he tried to hop the fence seemed like punishment enough...
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
You know getting black out drunk at a cats birthday party should have been my lowest point drinking wise but some how I feel like last night was some how worse
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
Randomize
