yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
You can't do wine Netflix and blow jobs in the bed you've had since 5th grade with your parents downstairs
she just kept pointing at the cows and calling them field penguins
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
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