The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
How am I supposed to be friends with him when there's an exact replica of his dick in my underwear drawer?
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
Randomize