Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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