i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize
