I figured girls wouldn't be down to sleep w/ a guy who plugged a pregnant chick
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
there's something so ridiculous to me about watching someone with glasses exercising. it's like watching a whore studying in the library. stop trying to be someone you're not.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
It's pizza for people who hate themselves. I rang the place up once i'd finished and told them if i was on death row it would be my last meal because by the time i'd got half way through it I would be begging to die.
But then I ordered two more because it was 2-4-1 and my life is a mess
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
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