the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
