it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
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