My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Randomize
