You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Oh god our sink is a cavalcade of horrors. Brb sacrificing a goat and putting everything in the dishwasher forever
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
It’s easy for me to be professional, the tough part is finding the perfect amount of bitchy undertone
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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