As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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