is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
You know you gave a quality blow job when you have to ice your neck and jaw the next day.
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
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