Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
There are leaves in my underwear?
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