So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
