I can tuck mytits in my pants
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
im sitting in the back of my pickup eating an artichoke. please come find me, im scared.
that was a mass text, wasnt it?
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
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