Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Randomize
