I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
New term. "Find a husband" fridays. It's like thirsty thursdays, but with a dowry.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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