I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
Oh Jesus. Are you going to the hospital?
No I'm showering then leaving for Vegas
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
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