He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Randomize
