...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
the only bad part about drinking alone is that in the morning there's nobody who can tell you what you did
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize
