I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Let's be real, he was never going to be tall enough
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