how can u be prego again
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I told him I thought I was pregnant and he told me he accidentally killed my bird.
Circle of life.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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