He disabled his match.com account in front of me
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
THESE BITCHES NOT IN MY MAJOR BETTER NOT FILL UP MY SLAVIC FAIRYTALES CLASS
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
