Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
My roommates just built a mini golf course upstairs while I was sleeping.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
I'm getting paid to get fucked up. How much better could this get?
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