What did we do last night that was yellow?
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
We made a percocet pizza. And then i made an unfortunate decision.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
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