we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
I just had a legitimate orgy. Wearing glowsticks.
Randomize
