They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
you kind of just crawled on top of him. that was the point at which i became concerned with how drunk you were.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Randomize
