i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Passed out mid cig in bed last night. Thank you cough for allowing me legal prescription hydrocodone.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
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