This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
When the phrase "Wow your huge" came out of her mouth I knew it was gonna be a good night.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
We need to go to the store an get depends. I really don't want to be bothered with the bathroom this weekend.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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