I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
fuck off. It's 10am and I'm drink gin and ginger ale through a twizzler straw. My life is marvellous
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize