Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
All I heard was "I swear it'll be funny" and then we were in jail.
There's cake. And donuts. And strippers. It's like 5 year old me and 20 year old me are throwing a party together...
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
I only saw you for about 5 min, but you were rambling about how not even the whiskey could make you fight the skeleton guards.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
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