Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
You texted him 17 times. Asking for him back and sending random pictures of Jimmy Buffett. He didn't answer.
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
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