So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Excuse me? I'm weird? You're the one sticking your penis into a pringles can.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Damn that brownie almost kicked my ass. I'm not sure if my flight home lasted 10 minutes or 10 days..
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