Dating a girl 4 years younger than you is like living in a Taylor Swift song...
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
All I can remember is being told by a guy named Kyle to stay in the corner until the cops left. Then waking up on a porch outlined in beer cans 8 blocks from my house. Pregaming for college.
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
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