well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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