She said her name was "party"
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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