quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
i just traded 2 rolls of toilet paper for half a water bottle of vodka. i love college
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
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